it scared me when i was walking home from school; the wind was nippy, and the air was clear. the sun was just about to fall, and i was thinking about being twenty; what that means, all that i have done...
and then i remembered that i am twenty-one, and that scared me half to death.
where did a whole year of my life go? did i lose it, or did i forget? or maybe i did, in fact, know i was twenty-one, and have a moment of relapse? and does it really mean something that i forgot how old i was, or is it nothing?
i was not terrified at the fact that i am twenty-one, but the fact that i forgot that i am twenty-one.
i feel like at my age, i shouldn't be saying anything about forgetting how old i am or the fact that i simply feel old, because that's a lie. sometimes i feel like a child, i am twenty-one after all. sometimes i feel like i am floating around in the same body that i had when i was fourteen (i am supposed to be taller!), and sometimes i feel scared and little. but then other times, i'm already twenty-one, and the future is a big ominous cloud that, sometimes, i am a little too afraid to think about. but everyone has moments where they feel like that, and that's okay.
so here's a funny story about how i forgot my age, and all my half-pint sagacity on the matter because, well, i am only twenty-one.
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